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There is an atheist swimming in the ocean. All of the sudden he sees this shark in the water, so he starts swimming towards his boat.
As he looks back he sees the shark turn and head towards him. His boat is a ways off and he starts swimming like crazy. He’s scared [...]

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other [...]

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.
The old priest suggests, “Cross you arms over your [...]

After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his
mother, “Mom, I’ve decided to become a minister when I grow up.”
“That’s okay with us, but what made you decide that?”
“Well,” said the little boy, “I have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it will
be more fun to [...]

The pastor shocked the congregation when he announced that he was resigning from the
church and moving to a drier climate.
After the service, a very distraught lady came to the pastor with tears in her eyes, “Oh,
Pastor Bob, we are going to miss you so much. We don′t want you to leave!”
The kindhearted pastor patted her [...]

“Calm down, Ma’am,” said the school counselor to the shattered mom. “It’s perfectly
normal. Many boys Little Johnny’s age masturbate.”
“I know,” sobbed his red-eyed mother, wiping the tears with her handkerchief, “but not in
church.”

A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them
to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday.
The following week she asked each child in turn what he or she had learned.
Susie said, “He was born in a manger.”
Bobby said, “He threw the money changers out of the [...]