The English teacher’s husband walked in and caught his wife sleeping with a young co-ed. He said, “Why, Susan, I’m surprised.” She bolted upright, pointed her finger and corrected him, “No. I am surprised. You are astonished.”
The child comes home from his first day at school.
Mother: “What did you learn today?”
Kid: “Not enough,Mom. I have to go back tomorrow.”
Customer: “Give me a hot dog.”
Waiter: “With pleasure.”
Customer: “No, with mustard, you idiot.!”
A tourist asks a man in uniform, “Are you a policeman?”
“No, I am an undercover detective.”
“So why are you in uniform?”
“Today is my day off.
Three men tragically died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.
“In honor of this year’s Holy Season” Saint Peter said, “you must each generate something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.”
The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. “It represents […]
According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December.
Female reindeer retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to EVERY historical rendition […]
1) Santa’s Outfit
How do you know Santa has to be a man?
No woman is going to wear the same outfit year after year.
2) Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale.
3) I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don’t know what size she wear.
4) Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for that hard-to-find person.
5) […]